A week ago, a still and peaceful Tuscany night is shattered by the shrill ringing of a telephone. A bleary eyed David Cameron is rudely awoken and answers. It's an iPhone4. The ring tone is 'David Watts' by The Kinks.
'Hello?'
'Dave- Rupert here. How's the holiday going?'
'Hallo mate. Well, not too bad, until some bugger woke me up at 3am!'
They share a matey chuckle.
'Sorry for being such a gullah mate, but things have got pretty sticky and I need to have a bit of a chat'
'Yeah- sorry about all that hacking stuff- in a bit of a tight spot old bean. Electorate and all that. Couldn't really turn a blind eye. Becky ok?'
'No dramas, she'll just pop off for a few months for a bit of a holiday. Just as well to be honest, its the soonest I could get her on Oprah to launch her over the pond. Might have to sell that place in Chipping Norton, but I expect you know a good agent'
'Of course. I'll give old Binky Netherchops a call'
'Right- to business- listen, this hacking business won't go away, we need to sort it out. I need something massive to get my teeth into. What about a little war? There must be some banana republic somewhere you can lay claim to. Usually does the trick'
'Its not a bad shout Roop, but unfortunately what with the Arab Spring and all; we're a bit thin on the ground, army wise. Add to that the fact I've sacked half of them, it ain't happening.. Like your thinking though. What about something on home soil? You get to sell loads of papers, I get to look like a hero for sorting it out, everyone's a winner!'
'Interesting. Why don't we get some sort of civil unrest. You can arrange for some minor incident to go wrong, I dunno, get some young guy from a shady area shot or something. It'll all kick off massively. They'll never suspect you had anything to do with it. You're the PM for starters, and you're on holiday.'
'It might just work you know. I can come back, unite society against the hoodlums, law and order and all that, and you can cover the lot. They'll have forgotten all about the News of the Screws in no time!'
'Nice one Dave. Make the call'
'No probs. See you when I'm back?'
'No mate, I'm not coming back for ages, too much aggro. Feel free to use the jet and the villa though.'
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Friday, June 10, 2011
Only Forward...
I've not just broken up or gone through anything particularly traumatic, but no-one does it like Michael Marshall Smith (Only Forward):-
"How many times have you tried to talk to someone about something that matters to you, tried to get them to see it the way you do? And how many of those times have ended with you feeling bitter, resenting them for making you feel like your pain doesn't have any substance after all?
Like when you've split up with someone, and you try to communicate the way you feel, because you need to say the words, need to feel that somebody understands just how pissed off and frightened you feel. The problem is, they never do. "Plenty more fish in the sea," they'll say, or "You're better off without them," or "Do you want some of these potato chips?" They never really understand, because they haven't been there, every day, every hour. They don't know the way things have been, the way that it's made you, the way it has structured your world. They'll never realise that someone who makes you feel bad may be the person you need most in the world. They don't understand the history, the background, don't know the pillars of memory that hold you up. Ultimately, they don't know you well enough, and they never can. Everyone's alone in their world, because everybody's life is different. You can send people letters, and show them photos, but they can never come to visit where you live.
Unless you love them. And then they can burn it down."
— Michael Marshall Smith (Only Forward)
tags: -only-forward- , life , love , reality 80 people liked it like
"How many times have you tried to talk to someone about something that matters to you, tried to get them to see it the way you do? And how many of those times have ended with you feeling bitter, resenting them for making you feel like your pain doesn't have any substance after all?
Like when you've split up with someone, and you try to communicate the way you feel, because you need to say the words, need to feel that somebody understands just how pissed off and frightened you feel. The problem is, they never do. "Plenty more fish in the sea," they'll say, or "You're better off without them," or "Do you want some of these potato chips?" They never really understand, because they haven't been there, every day, every hour. They don't know the way things have been, the way that it's made you, the way it has structured your world. They'll never realise that someone who makes you feel bad may be the person you need most in the world. They don't understand the history, the background, don't know the pillars of memory that hold you up. Ultimately, they don't know you well enough, and they never can. Everyone's alone in their world, because everybody's life is different. You can send people letters, and show them photos, but they can never come to visit where you live.
Unless you love them. And then they can burn it down."
— Michael Marshall Smith (Only Forward)
tags: -only-forward- , life , love , reality 80 people liked it like
Saturday, May 21, 2011
When I am King
I realise that in order for me to ascend to the throne, it would require some kind of post apocalyptic nemesis of such gargantuan proportions that the straggling survivors would want to quicken the end of days by electing me as their supreme representative. That said, who knows what lies round the corner, so here goes. I shall add to this periodically.
1. PEOPLE WHO SIT IN THE MIDDLE LANE OF MOTORWAYS. If the motorway is clear, you drive in the left hand lane. If you need to overtake, you use the lane in the middle. If you need to overtake yet more, the outside one. When I am King, if you are caught sitting in the middle lane, you can be as much of a coffin dodger as you like, you won't get away with it. Nothing Draconian as I have heard on other sites (shooting in the face, anything to do with car batteries). Quite simply, you would have your licence taken away for a fortnight. No excuses, that's it. I think this would be sufficient to ensure they did not do it again.
2. PEOPLE WHO CAN'T PARK. I am probably more sensitive to this than others. living and working in central London. I don't drive very often, preferring to cycle as you probably know. However, I often do for work. There are many parking bays which fit three cars. For some reason, often people park in such a way that no other cars would get in. This infringement would get you a parking ticket. But there would be no reduction in paid early. There is no time limit on selfishness. As you can see, I would be a fair and largely benevolent ruler.
3. THE USE OF PUBLIC TOILETS. If you would piss on the seat of your own toilet, that makes you n animal. Please don't do it in public. It's fucking disgusting. If you can't co-ordinate basic motor skills to lift the loo seat, wipe it after. Bringing me on to my next one - HOW CAN YOU NOT WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER USING A PUBLIC TOILET!
It is pure co-incidence that the first two items are motoring related. We shall see how this develops.
1. PEOPLE WHO SIT IN THE MIDDLE LANE OF MOTORWAYS. If the motorway is clear, you drive in the left hand lane. If you need to overtake, you use the lane in the middle. If you need to overtake yet more, the outside one. When I am King, if you are caught sitting in the middle lane, you can be as much of a coffin dodger as you like, you won't get away with it. Nothing Draconian as I have heard on other sites (shooting in the face, anything to do with car batteries). Quite simply, you would have your licence taken away for a fortnight. No excuses, that's it. I think this would be sufficient to ensure they did not do it again.
2. PEOPLE WHO CAN'T PARK. I am probably more sensitive to this than others. living and working in central London. I don't drive very often, preferring to cycle as you probably know. However, I often do for work. There are many parking bays which fit three cars. For some reason, often people park in such a way that no other cars would get in. This infringement would get you a parking ticket. But there would be no reduction in paid early. There is no time limit on selfishness. As you can see, I would be a fair and largely benevolent ruler.
3. THE USE OF PUBLIC TOILETS. If you would piss on the seat of your own toilet, that makes you n animal. Please don't do it in public. It's fucking disgusting. If you can't co-ordinate basic motor skills to lift the loo seat, wipe it after. Bringing me on to my next one - HOW CAN YOU NOT WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER USING A PUBLIC TOILET!
It is pure co-incidence that the first two items are motoring related. We shall see how this develops.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Branson - you should be ashamed of yourself
Virgin Media's turn. This is the exchange when I moved into a new flat in Winchester, while I'm on the general topic of extolling the totally apathetic incompetence of telecoms providers:
Me: 'Hi, can you install interbobs and your fibre optic tellymagic thing please?'
Virgin Media (VM): 'No problem. Next available date is a month'
Me: *sigh* 'Ok then. But make sure they come as I'll have to take a day off work'
~~~one month later with no interbobs or satellite telly~~~
Me: 'HI, your engineer's not here, it's midday, he's supposed to come in the morning?'
VM: 'Oh no, we cancelled that 3 weeks ago as you can't get fibre optic in that part of Winchester.'
Me: 'Did you call me, the fucking customer, and tell me?'
VM: 'Not my department. Sozzlepops'
Me: 'Hi, can you install interbobs and your fibre optic tellymagic thing please?'
Virgin Media (VM): 'No problem. Next available date is a month'
Me: *sigh* 'Ok then. But make sure they come as I'll have to take a day off work'
~~~one month later with no interbobs or satellite telly~~~
Me: 'HI, your engineer's not here, it's midday, he's supposed to come in the morning?'
VM: 'Oh no, we cancelled that 3 weeks ago as you can't get fibre optic in that part of Winchester.'
Me: 'Did you call me, the fucking customer, and tell me?'
VM: 'Not my department. Sozzlepops'
Monday, May 16, 2011
O2 - A staggering example of the worst possible customer service imaginable.
I'm generally a pretty honest bloke. I believe that karma can re-visit you, and why take the chance. So, rather than go to a moody fella down the Tottenham Court Road to get my iPhone 4 unlocked so I could use it abroad, I contacted my network provider. 'Well, Mr MacDonald, you've been on quite a high tariff now with us for some time, and there's never been a problem with your payment history, so that's fine.' I dutifully filled out the 'unlock my iPhone' form on their website, and then waited the aforementioned two weeks before receiving a text saying 'Your iPhone is now unlocked' Note, dear reader, that this is all the text said, nothing else.
I was away on holiday on my own for the first time, and one of the things I was looking forward to was blogging, and twittering, and facebooking etc. Luckily, Thailand is well served with WiFi hotspots.
The saddest thing about this whole debacle is that when I stepped bleary eyed off my plane in BAngkok and went to the AIS shop in the terminal, I was not the least bit surprised when they put in a Thai SIM and it didn't work. 'It's not unlocked' the Thai lady said, in her customary pleasant tone. I showed her the text from, O2 saying it had been, but as you can imagine, I might as well have been showing her the instructions to assemble a particularly challenging set of shelving from IKEA. The lady advised me to take it to the MBK centre in Bangkok where they'd sort it out.
I went there. This is using a day of my holiday, by the way O2. Shall I send you an invoice?
They sorted it out by putting in a gevey chip thing. www.gevey.com if you're interested, but I presume it's some kind of hack chip. It cost me about £35. Can I have that back, O2? Thought not.
I then entered into negotiations with O2 via twitter - this is when it really pissed me off. Precis to follow:
O2: Did you unlock?
Me: Yes
O2: Did you then sync?
Me: Yes [Although, where in your instructions does it tell you to do that? Nowhere, that's where]
O2: Have you synced it with a non O2 SIM before coming away?
Me: No. Where on earth do I get a non O2 micro SIM from, and why do I need to? You told me it was unlocked?
O2: You'll need to find a non O2 SIM and sync it with iTunes for it to work.
Let me insert a brief hiatus here, and also apologise for the swearing.
I'M ON TOP OF A FUCKING MOUNTAIN IN SOUTH EAST ASIA!!!!! WHERE THE FUCK DO I FIND A PC WITH ITUNES ALONG WITH A NICE MAN WHO WILL SUPPLY ME WITH A NICE SIM CARD AND TEST IT OUT.
I then received the following:-
Suffice it to say, I DM'd the number and got no response. None at all. And I told them that quite frankly, no I was not prepared to waste yet more of my holiday pissing about with a phone that should have taken me all of 5 minutes to sort out having followed all their instructions. No apology. Nothing. Throughout the exchange I was polite, and courteous. I understand O2 don't want people unlocking their phones for obvious reasons. But I bet they prefer even less their customers blogging like this, to over 1000 of their followers, then leaving to go to Orange as soon as they possibly can.
I think the saddest thing is that I'm just resigned to it. It's pathetic. Next time, I know for a fact there is a lovely chap on Tottenham Court Road who'll do the whole thing for me for a tenner. It'll probably invalidate my warranty, but the same fella will swop my smashed screen for £40, and their native insurance at £15 a month is a sum I am astonished they have the audactiy to charge. I get more comprehensive cover, including water damage, for £6 a month on my home insurance.
I cannot believe that there is no-one at this company that can see why this is unacceptable. Honestly, I have not been biased here- this is exactly how it happened. Are any of you really surprised either. They are all the same. I could tell you a story about Virgin installing home broadband when I moved to Winchester that I could only possibly file under fantasy fiction. Sky and BT? Don't make me laugh.
In the past, I have lauded O2 when they sorted their 3G network out. Often, when I speak to them they are very pleasant. Someone, find me the nefarious doom-monger who is orchestrating their appalling service performance.
I was away on holiday on my own for the first time, and one of the things I was looking forward to was blogging, and twittering, and facebooking etc. Luckily, Thailand is well served with WiFi hotspots.
The saddest thing about this whole debacle is that when I stepped bleary eyed off my plane in BAngkok and went to the AIS shop in the terminal, I was not the least bit surprised when they put in a Thai SIM and it didn't work. 'It's not unlocked' the Thai lady said, in her customary pleasant tone. I showed her the text from, O2 saying it had been, but as you can imagine, I might as well have been showing her the instructions to assemble a particularly challenging set of shelving from IKEA. The lady advised me to take it to the MBK centre in Bangkok where they'd sort it out.
I went there. This is using a day of my holiday, by the way O2. Shall I send you an invoice?
They sorted it out by putting in a gevey chip thing. www.gevey.com if you're interested, but I presume it's some kind of hack chip. It cost me about £35. Can I have that back, O2? Thought not.
I then entered into negotiations with O2 via twitter - this is when it really pissed me off. Precis to follow:
O2: Did you unlock?
Me: Yes
O2: Did you then sync?
Me: Yes [Although, where in your instructions does it tell you to do that? Nowhere, that's where]
O2: Have you synced it with a non O2 SIM before coming away?
Me: No. Where on earth do I get a non O2 micro SIM from, and why do I need to? You told me it was unlocked?
O2: You'll need to find a non O2 SIM and sync it with iTunes for it to work.
Let me insert a brief hiatus here, and also apologise for the swearing.
I'M ON TOP OF A FUCKING MOUNTAIN IN SOUTH EAST ASIA!!!!! WHERE THE FUCK DO I FIND A PC WITH ITUNES ALONG WITH A NICE MAN WHO WILL SUPPLY ME WITH A NICE SIM CARD AND TEST IT OUT.
I then received the following:-
Suffice it to say, I DM'd the number and got no response. None at all. And I told them that quite frankly, no I was not prepared to waste yet more of my holiday pissing about with a phone that should have taken me all of 5 minutes to sort out having followed all their instructions. No apology. Nothing. Throughout the exchange I was polite, and courteous. I understand O2 don't want people unlocking their phones for obvious reasons. But I bet they prefer even less their customers blogging like this, to over 1000 of their followers, then leaving to go to Orange as soon as they possibly can.
I think the saddest thing is that I'm just resigned to it. It's pathetic. Next time, I know for a fact there is a lovely chap on Tottenham Court Road who'll do the whole thing for me for a tenner. It'll probably invalidate my warranty, but the same fella will swop my smashed screen for £40, and their native insurance at £15 a month is a sum I am astonished they have the audactiy to charge. I get more comprehensive cover, including water damage, for £6 a month on my home insurance.
I cannot believe that there is no-one at this company that can see why this is unacceptable. Honestly, I have not been biased here- this is exactly how it happened. Are any of you really surprised either. They are all the same. I could tell you a story about Virgin installing home broadband when I moved to Winchester that I could only possibly file under fantasy fiction. Sky and BT? Don't make me laugh.
In the past, I have lauded O2 when they sorted their 3G network out. Often, when I speak to them they are very pleasant. Someone, find me the nefarious doom-monger who is orchestrating their appalling service performance.
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Thailand Day One
I didn't have much access to proper computermabobs, so I'll do this a bit at a time as I have free moments. I'll start quite simply by the first few things I learnt on my first day in Thailand
Some things I have learnt in 6 hours in Thailand.
1) A smile will get you 86% of the way anywhere.
2) The fourth floor of the MBK could turn even a root vegetable into a fully functioning smartphone.
3) We have much to learn from this poor, second world country about basic courtesy and manners. To each other as well as customer service environments
4) See above also for fast food
5) If carnal fulfillment is your bag, this is the place for you. Laminated illustrated price lists even in the taxis
6) I know you all said, but OMG IT'S HOT. In a muggy, fuggy, you feel like you're wrapped in a duvet next to a log fire kind of way.
And that is in the evening.
I shall expand and add to the above in blog form when I have time
Saturday, April 23, 2011
HSBC- the world's local bank.
I realise bankers are not exactly flavour of the decade. However, mine is going to extraordinary lengths to vex me at the moment. I went to Milan on New Year's Eve a couple of years ago (the day I joined Twitter as it happens, very hungover, in Milan airport, at the behest of @jameszabiela with whom I'd gone there.) and was highly inconvenienced when my card didn't work in an ATM I tried in town. Upon my return, I went into my local branch (Sloane Square at the time) and complained. The rather sniffy bank teller told me it was for 'my own good' as for all they knew my account was being pilfered by some sort of international hacking ring. The haughtiness with which this was delivered merely added to my annoyance. My attitude is, if they're so vigilant and customer care focused- they've got your number? Call you? They're quick enough to do so if you go over your overdraft by one nanopenny!
So now, whenever I go abroad, I ensure they are informed. Fair play to them, I thought, protecting the innocent and naive customer from their own folly. They're 'the world's local bank' after all, so they probably know best about travelling. But then I remembered that once I had had fraud on my card- originating from Costcutter in Streatham. My card was cancelled straight away, and a full refund delivered. Doubtless in accordance with come banking code or other- they are not known for their compensatory generosity. Which got me thinking- it's not for MY good at all, is it?
The reason HSBC have such Draconian criteria for this is that THEY don't want to lose the money. I have a few different accounts for one thing and another, and as I'm going abroad in a few days I thought I ought to notify them. HSBC have a facility on their home page to do this. I called RBS which is probably the account I'll be using most, and they said they don't have a facility for this. I got the chap's name, rank and serial number and said 'So, if I'm locked in negotiations with a sarong vendor on Rai Leh beach and having haggled it down to 20 baht I can't get my money out; you will deliver unto me your first born child?'
He said (to appease me) 'I'll make a note on the account, but it really isn't necessary.'
HSBC have such stringent measures because they know that if anyone fraudulently gets money from your account, they will have to refund it and don't get it back. Where does it go from here?
HSBC HQ:
'Charlie, Alasdair's getting money out from a cashpoint in Fulham. He NEVER goes west of Waterloo! Call the SWAT team! De-activate everything on his account! Lock that baby down'
It's ridiculous.
So, imagine my chagrin when I received a letter from them this morning, telling me that from now on, whenever I want to log into my account on the internet, I will have to use a card security reader.
Log in.
Not 'buy the Koh-I-Noor diamond'.
Log in.
A couple of points. This is ridiculous. I do banking all the time at work and at home. It's hard enough remembering keys wallet and phone without having to fanny about with a card reader as well. But worse than this is the sycophantic simpering of the accompanying letter.
'We're constantly evolving how we keep YOU protected, Secure Key is the latest of these innovations... it helps YOU ensure only YOU can access your internet banking...it's sleek design means it should [should? what the fuck do you know about my wallet?] fit easily into your purse or wallet'
So, basically, I've got to lug around a ZX Spectrum everywhere I go so I can access banking online. To me, this totally defeats the convenience of online banking. And my money is fine, old chum, if it gets fraudulently stolen, you'll give it back. A better approach from my point of view would have been something along the lines of:
'We keep getting shafted by online fraud. This is actually costing YOU money, because trust me, anything we have to shell out more than comes back to us - we just raise your charges or interest rates or account fees. Failing that, the government just gives it to us but we shaft you anyway'
What this Portas-esque approach would lack in subtlety, it at least would make up for in straight talking and lack of condescension.
So now, whenever I go abroad, I ensure they are informed. Fair play to them, I thought, protecting the innocent and naive customer from their own folly. They're 'the world's local bank' after all, so they probably know best about travelling. But then I remembered that once I had had fraud on my card- originating from Costcutter in Streatham. My card was cancelled straight away, and a full refund delivered. Doubtless in accordance with come banking code or other- they are not known for their compensatory generosity. Which got me thinking- it's not for MY good at all, is it?
The reason HSBC have such Draconian criteria for this is that THEY don't want to lose the money. I have a few different accounts for one thing and another, and as I'm going abroad in a few days I thought I ought to notify them. HSBC have a facility on their home page to do this. I called RBS which is probably the account I'll be using most, and they said they don't have a facility for this. I got the chap's name, rank and serial number and said 'So, if I'm locked in negotiations with a sarong vendor on Rai Leh beach and having haggled it down to 20 baht I can't get my money out; you will deliver unto me your first born child?'
He said (to appease me) 'I'll make a note on the account, but it really isn't necessary.'
HSBC have such stringent measures because they know that if anyone fraudulently gets money from your account, they will have to refund it and don't get it back. Where does it go from here?
HSBC HQ:
'Charlie, Alasdair's getting money out from a cashpoint in Fulham. He NEVER goes west of Waterloo! Call the SWAT team! De-activate everything on his account! Lock that baby down'
It's ridiculous.
So, imagine my chagrin when I received a letter from them this morning, telling me that from now on, whenever I want to log into my account on the internet, I will have to use a card security reader.
Log in.
Not 'buy the Koh-I-Noor diamond'.
Log in.
A couple of points. This is ridiculous. I do banking all the time at work and at home. It's hard enough remembering keys wallet and phone without having to fanny about with a card reader as well. But worse than this is the sycophantic simpering of the accompanying letter.
'We're constantly evolving how we keep YOU protected, Secure Key is the latest of these innovations... it helps YOU ensure only YOU can access your internet banking...it's sleek design means it should [should? what the fuck do you know about my wallet?] fit easily into your purse or wallet'
So, basically, I've got to lug around a ZX Spectrum everywhere I go so I can access banking online. To me, this totally defeats the convenience of online banking. And my money is fine, old chum, if it gets fraudulently stolen, you'll give it back. A better approach from my point of view would have been something along the lines of:
'We keep getting shafted by online fraud. This is actually costing YOU money, because trust me, anything we have to shell out more than comes back to us - we just raise your charges or interest rates or account fees. Failing that, the government just gives it to us but we shaft you anyway'
What this Portas-esque approach would lack in subtlety, it at least would make up for in straight talking and lack of condescension.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
iPhone - Argh! O2 - Argh! 3G in London - Argh!
I have long been a fan of the iPhone. I also have a macbook, and vastly prefer them to PCs. I like the interface, and they seem better suited to music and straight audio and visual media consumption, which is all I really use a home lappy for. I can't be bothered with the maintenance aspect of PCs either; trojans, malware, and viruses are (for now anyway) not things I have to worry about. Grist to the mill of the mighty Apple corporation also. I do think that inspiring such fanaticism is a fine and balanced line for Mr J and co to tread though- as we all know, there is a fine line between love and hate. Their recent staggering arrogance and proprietary behaviour will, in my humble opinion, be the source of their ultimate dilution.
More of that another time. I want to specifically castigate the iPhone, or more precisely it's symbiosis with O2.
I may need some help here, but is it all networks that get no signal in London? Something to do with density/ tall buildings? I live and work in the centre of one of the most vibrant and economic centres of the world. The 3G reception in N1 (work) and SE1 (home) is so bad, I have it permanently turned off. I have wireless at home and office so it's not a deal breaker, but even so, you'd expect better. And then browsing on the go?
Don't even get me started.
To be fair, in the west end and heart of the city, you can turn on 3G and it tends to be ok. In N4, N5, N16, an iPhone 3GS just will not function as a phone at all. I called O2 about this in August last year, and after much badgering, they told me they were upgrading their 3G network in that part of London, and it was best to turn 3G off. I now have an iPhone 4
It's still the same.
Five months later.
In the whole of the northern half of a city inhabited by 7.5 million people.
But as a phone it works fine with 3G turned off- it's just an issue for internet access via 3G.
But hey, that's ok, because as an O2 customer, you get free access to BT Openzones! Problem solved. Except you don't. If you were to take a casual stroll from Angel station up past Islington Green, your iPhone would be constantly connected to BT Openzone. But once you get 50 yds from the station, it will not work. No connection. So you have to turn it off. And then with no 3G, you're back on the 'dot of doom'. 1G reception. I'd be quicker going to the library and looking up the information I required in an encyclopaedia.
Because it seems to me that 95% of BT Openzones are not available for free to iPhone O2 customers. They are pay as you go zones, slaved off business or home hubs, which are understandably ubiquitous in the capital.
Do they tell you this in the shop? No.
Do they tell you this on the phone when you call them? No.
Please, someone tell me, is the iPhone any better on another network?
Even if it isn't, my next phone will, on current form, be the HTC HD-7. Windows 7 is lovely, and it works, unlike Vista which was like a baboon with an abacus. It has a bigger screen, is thinner, costs much less, and by the time my iPhone4 contract is up in about a year, will have all the apps I will ever need.
Not only that, increasing my insurance from £7.50 to £15 a month? At least Dick Turpin wore a mask.
So, do others have the same problems with their smartphones in North London?
Is it iPhone related?
Is it a universal problem with O2's network?
What do you think?
More of that another time. I want to specifically castigate the iPhone, or more precisely it's symbiosis with O2.
I may need some help here, but is it all networks that get no signal in London? Something to do with density/ tall buildings? I live and work in the centre of one of the most vibrant and economic centres of the world. The 3G reception in N1 (work) and SE1 (home) is so bad, I have it permanently turned off. I have wireless at home and office so it's not a deal breaker, but even so, you'd expect better. And then browsing on the go?
Don't even get me started.
To be fair, in the west end and heart of the city, you can turn on 3G and it tends to be ok. In N4, N5, N16, an iPhone 3GS just will not function as a phone at all. I called O2 about this in August last year, and after much badgering, they told me they were upgrading their 3G network in that part of London, and it was best to turn 3G off. I now have an iPhone 4
It's still the same.
Five months later.
In the whole of the northern half of a city inhabited by 7.5 million people.
But as a phone it works fine with 3G turned off- it's just an issue for internet access via 3G.
But hey, that's ok, because as an O2 customer, you get free access to BT Openzones! Problem solved. Except you don't. If you were to take a casual stroll from Angel station up past Islington Green, your iPhone would be constantly connected to BT Openzone. But once you get 50 yds from the station, it will not work. No connection. So you have to turn it off. And then with no 3G, you're back on the 'dot of doom'. 1G reception. I'd be quicker going to the library and looking up the information I required in an encyclopaedia.
Because it seems to me that 95% of BT Openzones are not available for free to iPhone O2 customers. They are pay as you go zones, slaved off business or home hubs, which are understandably ubiquitous in the capital.
Do they tell you this in the shop? No.
Do they tell you this on the phone when you call them? No.
Please, someone tell me, is the iPhone any better on another network?
Even if it isn't, my next phone will, on current form, be the HTC HD-7. Windows 7 is lovely, and it works, unlike Vista which was like a baboon with an abacus. It has a bigger screen, is thinner, costs much less, and by the time my iPhone4 contract is up in about a year, will have all the apps I will ever need.
Not only that, increasing my insurance from £7.50 to £15 a month? At least Dick Turpin wore a mask.
So, do others have the same problems with their smartphones in North London?
Is it iPhone related?
Is it a universal problem with O2's network?
What do you think?
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Throw him to the lions! Probably. Or maybe not.
I read that a 32 year old man has been arrested on suspicion of the murder of Jo Yeates. And with it, the sickening realisation that in the minds of many of the population, a sigh of relief is breathed, as this monster is now out of society's way and safely in custody.
A few words about judicial process. I hasten to add that I have no specialised knowledge in this area.
There are a number of instances which may give the police cause to make an arrest. They may be circumstantial, accusatory, evidence based, whatever. In order to question a person thoroughly, it is necessary to remove them from normal circulation and place them at the disposal of the police. Once the suspect has been arrested, more evidence is gathered. The police will then either charge the suspect, or release them on bail to return to a police station after a set amount of time, or remand them in custody until a set date in the future whilst the file is reviewed by the CPS.
If released on bail, the police will continue to gather evidence, and have a threshold past which there is sufficient cause for them to pass the file to the CPS who will then decide if there is sufficient evidence to provide the realistic prospect of a conviction.
All of this is done without the CPS seeing any defence material or mitigation. That starts after the person has been charged, if indeed they are.
The fact that conclusions are leapt to, and speculation is thrown about by the sensationalist media in this country not only ruins people's lives; it genuinely spoils the chance of a successful conviction of the perpetrator. There are a number of tiny issues which can prejudice a jury or a trial - and thank God these safety nets are in place - and the more of this ill intentioned gasbagging that goes on, the less chance there is of this case being solved.
If the man who has been arrested is guilty of this horrific crime, the 'public interest' these tabloids and their sycophants harp on about would be much better served by them shutting up and allowing the judiciary to carry out its function in a proper fashion.
And if you think I'm exaggerating, maybe you'd like to think about how the life of the retired schoolteacher, Mr. Jefferies has changed since his arrest and subsequent release. Not for the better, I suspect.
A few words about judicial process. I hasten to add that I have no specialised knowledge in this area.
There are a number of instances which may give the police cause to make an arrest. They may be circumstantial, accusatory, evidence based, whatever. In order to question a person thoroughly, it is necessary to remove them from normal circulation and place them at the disposal of the police. Once the suspect has been arrested, more evidence is gathered. The police will then either charge the suspect, or release them on bail to return to a police station after a set amount of time, or remand them in custody until a set date in the future whilst the file is reviewed by the CPS.
If released on bail, the police will continue to gather evidence, and have a threshold past which there is sufficient cause for them to pass the file to the CPS who will then decide if there is sufficient evidence to provide the realistic prospect of a conviction.
All of this is done without the CPS seeing any defence material or mitigation. That starts after the person has been charged, if indeed they are.
The fact that conclusions are leapt to, and speculation is thrown about by the sensationalist media in this country not only ruins people's lives; it genuinely spoils the chance of a successful conviction of the perpetrator. There are a number of tiny issues which can prejudice a jury or a trial - and thank God these safety nets are in place - and the more of this ill intentioned gasbagging that goes on, the less chance there is of this case being solved.
If the man who has been arrested is guilty of this horrific crime, the 'public interest' these tabloids and their sycophants harp on about would be much better served by them shutting up and allowing the judiciary to carry out its function in a proper fashion.
And if you think I'm exaggerating, maybe you'd like to think about how the life of the retired schoolteacher, Mr. Jefferies has changed since his arrest and subsequent release. Not for the better, I suspect.
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